I’m an angry person.
I know why I’m angry. I know all the traumas that made me angry.
But what am I angry for?
Again, I know why I am angry. But the question is, what am I angry for?
Like, what if I just wasn’t angry, even though I have reason to be angry? Not letting go of my anger. Just not experiencing it.
I always think about that stoic idea from Marcus Aurelius. About how I should decide I am already dead, and live my life accordingly.
If I am already dead, then what is there to be angry for?
Again, even if I was dead, conscious in the afterlife, I would know why I was angry. But there would be nothing left to be angry for.
Things are worth justice. But it is interesting to think that the things that are worth my justice, might not be worth my anger because that clouds my judgment.
It’s somehow easier to give what is deserved if I bury my anger. It comes naturally. I can see the value of relationships if I start fresh constantly and bury my anger.
Again. I never bury reality, just my anger. Because even though I know why I am angry. I don’t know what I am angry for.
